How to have anal sex without pain
Anal sex can be very pleasurable… but it should never be painful!
The anus has many nerve endings and is surrounded by muscles that contract when having an orgasm, so it has infinite erogenous potential. Why not take advantage of it? If you want to know how to have anal sex without pain, pay attention to these tips!
General warnings
- The anus does not lubricate itself, so lubricant becomes your best friend during anal sex.
- To start anal sex, we do not recommend using anesthetics, since we could hurt ourselves because we would lose sensitivity.
- The anus does not have a stop, like the vagina, which is closed by the cervix, but is directly connected to the intestine. Make sure your toys have stops.
- The anus may “leak.” It is totally natural but, if you want to avoid them, you can always use anal duche.
- Being relaxed is essential.
- Never use the same toy for the anus and vagina. If you use a condom, change it. If you are going to share an anal sex toy, always do so using and changing a condom.
Steps to practice anal sex safely
Negotiate limits
Talking about consent and limits is essential before any sexual practice, especially those where you feel most vulnerable. Talk about what games you are going to allow, how you would like to explore anal pleasure, what you are not comfortable with…
Control
Before the games, get comfortable and locate the external sphincter to know how to relax and control it: contract and relax the anus intermittently. Then maintain the contraction for a few seconds and relax.
Relaxation
Relaxing is essential, especially when it comes to the pelvic muscles : if you squat or lie down with your legs bent and in the air, you will help the sphincters to open.
| You can play with anal plugs beforehand to help you dilate your muscles while giving you pleasure. |
Lubrication
The anal mucous membranes are very delicate and excessive friction could cause irritation and fissures, which is why it is essential to use a lubricant . Remember: saliva, oils and Vaseline can ruin the condom!
Progressiveness
You can stimulate yourself alone or ask your sexual partner to start by massaging the perineal area: in circles, pressing gently, from top to bottom. Alternatively you can ask him to approach the anus and continue in the same way ( Anal Surfacing) . No hurries!
Anal stimulation
Try to get into a position that allows relaxation of the pelvic muscles (legs raised and bent or squatting) and, either manually, with toys or with your sexual partner’s penis, stimulate the anus by making shallow and slow penetrations ( Anal Shallowing) .
| You can play while you stimulate other areas of the body such as the clitoris, nipples or penis ( Anal Pairing). |
And above all, if it hurts, stop. It is important that you enjoy it and take it easy if necessary.